Welcome to Empirical Purple

A blog by Simon Brady to cover a surprisingly wide range of geekiness, in a combination that no-one else does quite the same way. Probably. Either that, or it'll just be Simon talking about the likes of Football (usually the Soccer variety), PC & Tabletop Gaming, WWE, Movies, Music and occasionally even my actual job of Graphic Design, depending on what I'm up to in the world.

Sunday, August 01, 2010

By Accident or Design

What made today's Hungarian Grand Prix - won by newly famed Number-Two driver and all round cool guy Mark Webber - interesting was not the astounding pace that the Red Bulls found (again).

Nor was it how comically wide David Coulthard's chin is, how bad McLaren were, or how many people Martin Brundle found to hilariously interview on the grid pre-race.

It was the accidents.

Vettel was looking on course to have finished the race, changed and showered before Button even made his first pit stop. And, as the usual procession sweeps round the track became apparent, we were having to wait for the first round of pit stops for any form of excitement. Someone would do themselves a quick in-lap and out-lap and mystically manage to leap ahead of a car they had, until then, been level-pegging with. Then the whole procession would fly around the Hungaroring again until the winner was inevitably crowned in a sea of onlooking disappointment and regret that yet another of sport's most glamorous events was, in fact, really boring.

Accidents occurring is perhaps the only thing that can really make a Formula One interesting. Sure, overtaking at break-neck speed is nice, but how often do we see that?

As the boring, annoying, all-round arse Sebastian Vettel took roughly a second per lap extra lead against the dour, annoying, easily-provoked Fernando Alonso in the opening laps, the race was getting very tedious indeed.

Hilarious calamity ensued as a piece of a Force India's front wing promptly fell off in the middle of the rack. Cue everyone coming into the pits quick sharp, forcing Vettel to mount the kerb in an "oh shit, that's the junction I need to get off at!" manoeuvre; prompting a Renault and a Force India to crash into each other in the pit-lane at precisely the same time, and indeed in the same camera shot, as Nico Rosberg's new rear-right tyre flying off, scattering pit crew left, right and centre.

The Safety Car period that was needed to clear the debris off the track was also great, as it gave Vettel a drive-through penalty for maintaining an extra-safe distance behind the Safety Car, meaning Webber could scoot off into the distance.

So, other than the accidents? Bore. Ing.

Oh, except Schumacher trying to put Barrichello in the wall, which was scary-yet-hilarious, too. Must be because Schumi really is The Stig and hates having his lap time in the Suzuki Liana around the Dunsfold track beaten.

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